Posts Tagged ‘Manny Ramirez’

Is This Real Life?

February 24, 2012

Yes, yes it is. Finally. I’d rather be face down on my keyboard from lack of sleep, obsessively checking Twitter and stalking every journalist within 100 miles of here, but it is nice to have my normal routine back. Fresh laundry and a clean room for the first time in two weeks? No complaints. Besides, big girls don’t cry, right?

I miss being a part of the craziness of MLB Fan Cave. I really do. It was the most ridiculous, surprising two weeks of my life. But check out the list of things I’ve been able to do in the 24 hours since finding out my fate:

1. Laundry – I haven’t worn clean boxers since Valentine’s Day. I’ll let you decide if I’m kidding or not, ladies. Good luck.

2. Clean my room – Actually, I had become pretty good at just doing a standing long jump from my doorway to my bed every night. It was either that, or do backstroke through the mess.

3. Hit the gym – My body hates me. I haven’t seen the inside of a gym in weeks. Okay fine, months, but I couldn’t afford it until recently. Back off!

4. Talk to people – Yeah, you heard me. Just ask my pre-Fan Cave friends. Besides parents and co-workers, who I was forced to interact with (just kidding, I love you all), I spent the majority of my social life for the past two weeks either on Twitter or Tiny Chat, talking to the same 20 or so people all night. It was fantastic, but now I don’t have to feel like a dick for deserting everyone else I care about.

5. Take a real lunch break – For two weeks straight, I left the office at noon, took my hastily-made sandwich from the fridge, scarfed it, and sat back down at my computer by 12:03. Hey, 57 extra minutes to campaign!

There are many more I’m sure I’ll stumble over in the coming days, but that’s what I’ve noticed so far. Anyway, I wanted to briefly highlight another exceptionally positive impact the Fan Cave experience had on me.

Pure inspiration. I can’t remember the last time I was this motivated to lock myself in my room all weekend and work on my writing. But that’s literally all I want to do. Unless the weather stays this nice in Northern California…NO. I’m writing. Which also contradicts my 4th list item above. Shit. We’ll see.

But I really am absolutely driven right now to just write for days, and it feels great. I think getting that close to something so prolific that I never even dreamed of having a shot at made me realize that I can achieve everything I want to do. God that sentence was sappy. Anyone have wine to go with that cheese?

I mean it though. Doors are already starting to open. I’m now the Editor of the Dodgers baseball blog on FanvsFan.com. I’ve also accepted a position as a contributing writer for Lasorda’s Lair, another Dodger blog that supported me in my campaign. And, true story: Doug Glanville tweeted me today. Like, tweeted ME. Not a re-tweet or a response, he initiated twit-conversation. I can only imagine it was to offer me a job with ESPN, or perhaps as the next Commissioner of baseball.

By the way, keep an eye (or an ear) out. Myself, KP, Mapes, Brian, Angelo and Abby are creating a badass baseball podcast made up of snubbed Fan Cavers. And it’s going to be awesome. But the fact that it’s even a possibility is another example of how inspiring that whole experience was. I’m makin’ moves, people!

So today, I leave you with something else I’ve been missing over the last two weeks. Continuing my daily themes on Jam Shots! Let’s start fresh. Because I’m in a sing-along mood, here’s the Friday Song of the Week. I dig it – so glad that’s the number one song in the world right now!

Happy Manny is Back Day!

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Manny Mania!

February 21, 2012

Billy Beane is running a circus in Oakland, and I love it. The A’s are going to challenge for the worst record in the Majors this year, so why not have a little fun? After stealing Cuban sensation Yeonis Cespedes about a week ago, Beane moved in and signed potential Hall-of-Famer Manny Ramirez to a 1-year, $500,000 contract. I know what you’re doing right now. You’re moaning and groaning and crying CHEATER!

Well folks, get over it. Because it’s going to be the only thing worth watching at o.Co Coliseum in 2012. Let me preface this blog by admitting that I have a problem. I’m a Manny fan. I think he is absolutely hilarious and a complete dick. But not in the cocky way of A-Rod. More like the “this game is really fun and enjoy hitting a baseball very far for a living” way. How can you hate a guy that has such a damn good time on the field?

And if that isn’t enough for you, at least watch him hit and tell me he doesn’t have the sweetest right-handed swing in the game. No type of fertility drug can create a swing that perfect. Regardless of how many hormones he has swimming around in that body of his, Manny is one of the best hitters to ever play the game. Same as Barry Bonds, he tarnished his legacy with the failed test, but it doesn’t mean he wasn’t a spectacular player to begin with.

Back to Oakland – Manny will miss the first 50 games of the season due to his suspension. Which is perfect. Because that gives all our young prospects who have either been blocked for years or just sucked the big one when they got their shot, 50 games to prove themselves. If any of them hit like crazy, they will stay in the lineup and Bob Melvin will find a way to get Manny in there. If they don’t hit, they blew their chance and we’ve got a Hall-of-Famer hitting cleanup.

And if Manny hits 10 home runs in 110 games this year, it’s well worth the 500K. If he hits 10 home runs by the trade deadline, I guarantee Beane will squeeze a top prospect out of a desperate AL team in need of a DH for the playoffs. It’s a win-win situation. No harm, no foul, unless you are seriously offended by men injecting female junk into themselves. Or if you hate dreadlocks.

I promise, A’s fans. It’s going to be fun. And you’ll love watching Manny being Manny. It may be the only bearable part of a long, sad season.

Who knows…maybe he’ll give you a high five after a play!


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