No Wonder

No wonder the economy stinks. Terrell Owens is having two Dallas-area condos auctioned off soon. Because he blew all $80 million he made playing in the NFL. Eighty million dollars? How? I can make $80 last a month, and this dude blew $80 million in a decade. Or just under a million a month. He deserves to be bankrupt. Sorry I’m not sorry.

Athletes and former athletes blowing their big fortunes has been a problem in sports (especially the NFL and NBA) for years now. With greater fortune, comes greater risk and responsibility. Unfortunately, according to the radio this morning, over half of former NFL and NBA players are now out of money. I don’t know where it’s all going, but I assume to mansions, cars and diamond-encrusted watches.

I can understand the desire to own such things. I’d like a fancy car someday. I even have my house plans already sketched out (and it ain’t gonna be cheap). And I also know what it’s like to spend my money stupidly. You know what you’re doing as you do it. Sometimes you stop, most of the time you go ahead, justifying it with the assertion that you have another paycheck coming next week, or that you’ll be able to pay if off a few months later.

Well, it doesn’t work like that. If you make $80 million, you factor in losing some to taxes. You factor in the cost of living, whether that be extravagantly or otherwise. You factor in bills and rent and gas money. You factor in paying for food and services and education for your family. That leaves a multi-millionaire with…oh, I don’t know. Multiple millions of dollars.

So, how did T.O. blow such a huge chunk of change in ten years? I don’t know and I don’t care, it just frustrates me beyond belief. Balancing a checkbook takes 10 seconds and is a very simple skill to learn. Hell, hire an accountant to take care of it for you. You have the money.

But instead, players like Owens are turning their ridiculous contracts into ridiculous debts. And I really don’t feel bad. Not because I’m jealous that they are professional athletes making millions of dollars. I am, that’s for sure, but that’s not why I don’t sympathize. It’s because besides the physical commitment that goes with being a celebrity/athlete, there are three things you need to be able to balance: your relationship with teammates, your relationship with the media, and a damn checkbook.

Which of the three sounds most difficult? If you answered option C, you’ve won a prize! Oh wait…Owens was sponsoring this blog and now can’t afford to give you a prize. Sucks to be you.

It’s hard for me to justify being upset that Roger Goodell makes so much money anymore. Because I hear about things like this, where it’s so fiscally irresponsible that I just want to run around screaming and punching walls, and I just can’t comprehend. Most of us sit in a cubicle and type e-mails for 40+ hours a week. And these guys who are blessed with the physical tools to compete at the highest level of sport in the world, are taking it completely for granted.

Tell ya what, T.O. I know you’re looking for a job. So, let’s trade. You take my job and I’ll audition for NFL scouts. I’ll tell you one thing for sure. If I make a roster and get a fat paycheck for catching a freakin’ football and running away from scary-looking dudes, I won’t treat it like Monopoly money.

Rant, end.

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