Manny Mania!

Billy Beane is running a circus in Oakland, and I love it. The A’s are going to challenge for the worst record in the Majors this year, so why not have a little fun? After stealing Cuban sensation Yeonis Cespedes about a week ago, Beane moved in and signed potential Hall-of-Famer Manny Ramirez to a 1-year, $500,000 contract. I know what you’re doing right now. You’re moaning and groaning and crying CHEATER!

Well folks, get over it. Because it’s going to be the only thing worth watching at o.Co Coliseum in 2012. Let me preface this blog by admitting that I have a problem. I’m a Manny fan. I think he is absolutely hilarious and a complete dick. But not in the cocky way of A-Rod. More like the “this game is really fun and enjoy hitting a baseball very far for a living” way. How can you hate a guy that has such a damn good time on the field?

And if that isn’t enough for you, at least watch him hit and tell me he doesn’t have the sweetest right-handed swing in the game. No type of fertility drug can create a swing that perfect. Regardless of how many hormones he has swimming around in that body of his, Manny is one of the best hitters to ever play the game. Same as Barry Bonds, he tarnished his legacy with the failed test, but it doesn’t mean he wasn’t a spectacular player to begin with.

Back to Oakland – Manny will miss the first 50 games of the season due to his suspension. Which is perfect. Because that gives all our young prospects who have either been blocked for years or just sucked the big one when they got their shot, 50 games to prove themselves. If any of them hit like crazy, they will stay in the lineup and Bob Melvin will find a way to get Manny in there. If they don’t hit, they blew their chance and we’ve got a Hall-of-Famer hitting cleanup.

And if Manny hits 10 home runs in 110 games this year, it’s well worth the 500K. If he hits 10 home runs by the trade deadline, I guarantee Beane will squeeze a top prospect out of a desperate AL team in need of a DH for the playoffs. It’s a win-win situation. No harm, no foul, unless you are seriously offended by men injecting female junk into themselves. Or if you hate dreadlocks.

I promise, A’s fans. It’s going to be fun. And you’ll love watching Manny being Manny. It may be the only bearable part of a long, sad season.

Who knows…maybe he’ll give you a high five after a play!


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5 Responses to “Manny Mania!”

  1. serredizzle Says:

    manny ramirez is such a chode…”Regardless of how many hormones he has swimming around in that body of his, Manny is one of the best hitters to ever play the game.”

    Its not like I super dislike the dude, but seeing those two sentences one after another just made me hate him even more… I just dont think we can keep disregarding how many drugs these guys are really taking… There is no fucking way manny is one of the best hitters to play the game, and im not even looking at stats…Im not really up on new baseball for that reason alone… I dont really care to watch a sport full of drugged up muscled out dudes who dont give two fucks about the game….

    obviously no one cares about my opinion, and thats fine, just sucks to see people become somewhat complacent with these assholes that in my opinion have near completely ruined a sport….

  2. jamblinman Says:

    I think that saying they ruined the sport would be valid anywhere from about ’98-’04. It has SIGNIFICANTLY changed since then. It’s still a problem, obviously but nowhere near as bad. And there is a huge difference between being an okay player who roids and then drops 50 bombs for 2 seasons and gets a fat contract and tiny testes out of it. And it’s another thing to consistently hit .300/40 homers/100 RBI. That’s not something that beefing up gets you. I appreciate the comment, but if you’re “not up on new baseball,” I can see why you think it’s just a sport full of roided out players who don’t care about the game…but that couldn’t be more inaccurate. Besides, half this blog is about how I love Manny BECAUSE he loves the game. That much, nobody can take from him.

  3. serredazzle Says:

    in short, manny ramirez is whats wrong with baseball, and thats why he will be just fine for the A’s ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. serredazzle Says:

    hey thats why i follow this blog, trying to get back into the swing of things ๐Ÿ™‚ no pun intended

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