Not Your Ordinary Sports Blog

Today, we are not focusing on my addiction. We are focusing on the only more important thing in the world than sports: Me! Obviously. But seriously, I’m on my knees here. Pleading, begging, shining your shoes; whatever it takes. All I’m asking. Is for a little respect…

Just a little bit.

Or maybe just your vote. This is a campaign of sorts, (a JAMpaign, perhaps?) but it’s not nearly as expensive for me as President Obama’s re-election run will be. Not nearly as pointless as anyone not named Barack’s attempt will be. And certainly not as idiotic as Roseanne Barr’s.

But it’s absolutely more important. To me. And if you love me, which you do, it’s important for you as well. I’ve been selected as one of the 50 finalists for the MLB Fan Cave competition. That means I’m better than approximately 9,950 other baseball nerds at making videos and being pretty.

The next step is to be better than 9,970 other hopefuls. For the mathematically challenged, that means we are being sliced from 50 to 30. Over the next two weeks, I have to garner enough votes on MLBFanCave.com to make the final roster of 30 candidates, who are flown to Arizona for the next step; spending a week at Spring Training.

**UPDATE: I stand corrected, for once. I was picked out of a pool of over 22,000 applicants!**

That’s where YOU come in. Please find my doofy video, (don’t watch it unless you want to laugh at me and make me cry) and vote. I’ve linked it in this blog multiple times. I’m dropping hints as big as New York City. Speaking of the Big Apple, if I continue to progress through this competition, MLB Network will put me up in the city and force me into hard labor. The final job? Watching every single one of the 2,000-plus baseball games from March through November and making regular appearances on the network interviewing players.

And just for the record, among the names of people confirmed to visit the MLB Fan Cave in 2012 are David Ortiz, Brandon Phillips, C.C. Sabathia and…wait for it. Matt mother-freakin’ Kemp. My baseballs are dropping just thinking about meeting those guys.

I know this seems like a plea for sending me on an eight-month vacation. But I promise, it’s more like rehab. And I know you all enjoy my blog way too much for me to go get my problem fixed. Still, this is an absolute dream job. I’ve loved baseball since the doctors were wiping bodily fluids off my freshly-born face. Wow, sorry about that…

And it could really take me places. I can’t ask for a better opportunity. All I need are your votes. Just a click to the link, a scroll to the video, and one more click for your favorite jambler’s video. I guess this is the moment I reveal my name, so you can accurately click away. I go by Jamblinman, but the parents call me “Jeremy” for some reason. My surname is “Dorn.” That’s about as vague as it will get. But if you didn’t put two and two together, you have more problems than you know.

So please. Go to MLBFanCave.com and find that Jeremy Dorn guy, watch his video if you are a torturous, horrible person, but most importantly, VOTE! Everyone who votes for me gets 50 bucksan open-mouthed kiss…a high five. Yes, hand-to-hand contact. Get excited.

Vote for me. Yes we can!

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2 Responses to “Not Your Ordinary Sports Blog”

  1. Jillian @ Brilliant Title Says:

    You’re clean shaven in the video! Hooray!

  2. Linda Says:

    This made me laugh. Well done!

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